Night Owl.

when the night is still and quiet

that’s when it’s the darkest.

the stars shine brighter

and my mind grows wider.

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Dream

cuddled up in my warm blanket and still in bed.

i woke up and got a phone call…i don’t remember who it was.

but it was so….lovely.

i felt my heart beating so loudly the heavens could hear.

the butterflies in my stomach resurrected from the dead.

and i finally felt that amazing first feeling.

it’s been so long, that i have forgotten.

my heart became a realist & gave up on being an optimist.

too bad i woke up realizing it was all a dream.

a dream so far away that i don’t really believe in it anymore.

Love Thing.

I don’t know how i feel about this…this whole love thing. I’ve never been in love.

And when i see it now in movies and in real life, i think to myself and suddenly i feel

…foreign.

It’s a strange feeling and i can’t see myself ever experiencing it.

I’m not being sad or anything. I have just come to realization of what my life has become.

I’m sure this thought and feeling will subside in due time, but for now

I can’t help but feel this odd separation between me and love.

Because me and love don’t exist.

yet.

Badly

just once i’d love for my heart to let my mind know how i feel.

all this confusing bullshit is just that. bullshit.

i want to scream out that i’ve let my guard down,

but in reality, my wall has turned into a rock.

i want so badly to just feel something.

something real and something that i’m sure of.

when i think of you, i’m not sure.

Changes

it’s funny how you look back into your past and realize how much you’ve changed.

little by little things shift,

it moves and follows you everywhere.

like a shadow that is slowly being consumed by your personality.

it’s scary but lovely at the same time.

to know that you have the power to reinvent yourself.

fall once, twice, three times…stay strong.